Thread: Let's Try This Again, Shall We?

Alright, so a few months ago I made a poetry thread things with things I write. I'm no where near good and I just thought I'd put here for your guy's criticism and suggestions ^.^ and I'll try to keep then as non-depressing as possible. Also, I can do partial raps and stuff if you want me to try and make one

First One:

One drop, two drop, three drops, four,
I just don't see the point in living anymore,
I saw that you are never around,
So I thought it's time I'm never found,
I cry blood,
You kick me into the mud,
I can jump in the pool and drown,
I promise you I will not frown,
Give your cheek a little peck,
Jump down and break my neck,
Choose my favorite knife,
Slit my wrist and end my life,
Hold that gun to my head,
Pull the trigger and then I'm dead,
Trust me babe you won't hear another sound,
Cause next time you see me I'll be underground,

Wow very deep, but very well worded I would like to see some more of your work !

Im a bit of a stoner,
But damnn girl.. I got a boner,

Like that ^?

Nice lol, keep em coming!

Niceee sooo deep <3

Crak- Das what she said ;3

Another-


Forever~*

People always say we will be for never,
But I always say we will be together forever,
First time I looked into your eyes,
My mind went spinning,
World came closing in around me,
Only now I know how close we came to be,
Now that I think of it,
You are a part of me,
A part of my heart,
Without you my life would just fall apart,
All I want you to do I stay,
Wrapped in my arms so I know you're always okay,
I hope you feel the same way,
I need you here,
Without you I think I'll disappear,
Just think about a world so true,
Where every thing is about you,
I need you throughout my life before,
I don't see the point in living anymore,
You're just like an angel so high,
When I'm with you I feel like I might just fly,
Come here and take my hand,
So together here we will stand,
We will always be covered in light,
Cause we know what's right,
We'll never fight,
It will for sure be a delight,
Whenever we kiss,
It is nothing but eternal bliss,
let's hope we never miss ;P

yo there really good and u should beacome a poetry when u grow up

Thanks everyone

Originally Posted by TnT B3AST

Im a bit of a stoner,
But damnn girl.. I got a boner,

Like that ^?

haha nice one TnT!

Tbh, I really put that in a poem for a girl XDXD she smiled, and since she's a stoner, jajaja